We all have one. We all need one. We all must use it every so often. Case in point, when I started down this divorce process, I was pretty passive. My X made extremely good money and I trusted that he would take care of us. It became clear after about six months, that this wouldn't be the case. It took me another six or eight months to bring out my inner bitch. I fired my lawyer and proceeded onward with someone who was looking out for mine and the kids best interest. It was clear that my X was not. I tell you this because whether you are male or female, and going through this process, you'll need to find your inner bitch and make very good friends with her. Standing up for yourself isn't always easy when someone is constantly trying to degrade you or bring you down. Their job is to destroy you until you wave the white flag and yell, "I give up. You win". In the end, that is all your X will want....for you to give up and walk away. You must bring out your inner bitch and say, "Nope. Not today. Not ever." It will take time to hone your skills but the first thing you can do is say "No. I will not let you treat me this way." You know what is right. You know how you want to be treated. If your X can't treat you with decency, then bring out your inner bitch and let him/her know.
If you can't find your inner bitch, email me...I'll bring her out for you.
Hugs to you!
I have to take a moment and thank you (you all know who you are) for the emails that you've been sending me. You are not alone in this process. You will make it! I got you and I'm always here.